Soak the Rich: IBM

Proving that corporations are wily, cheating devils, International Business Machines tried to avoid its turn as the next S&P 500 corporation to be soaked. IBM did so by hopping over Chevron in the index’s top 10; bad move, IBM! If there’s one thing Sherrod Brown is good at (note: Sherrod Brown is awesome at all sorts of things), it’s taxing the wealthy... so higher market capitalization means increased taxes plus a good tongue-lashing to boot!

Now Soaking: IBM

• Using the company’s MarketWatch profile as I have the past two weeks, IBM’s CEO pay is... not listed?! Not so fast, fat-cats! Reuters lists CEO Samuel Palmisano’s compensation as $31,718,600. We’ll be taking that to fund more of the terrific stimulus spending Sherrod Brown loves.
• IBM’s income statement lists $4.89 billion in corporate income tax for 2010. Doubling that will also help Sherrod Brown and President Obama sustain the economic recovery we’re all enjoying so much.
• IBM’s additional contributions to the welfare state will reduce the $1.62 trillion 2011 budget deficit alllll the way down to $1,615,078,281,400.

Remember, as we’ve learned from the last Soak the Rich progress review and every domestic policy speech Sherrod Brown has ever given: taking more from big corporations has no negative effects! If we double IBM’s corporate taxes and take all the CEO’s pay, it won’t have any unintended consequences at IBM or elsewhere. Things won’t get more expensive, no one holding any of the company’s 1.2 billion shares of stock will suffer unduly, and certainly none of IBM’s 426,751 employees will lose their jobs.

We, The People who support Sherrod Brown’s fiscal policies, hold these leftist conceits to be self-evident.

Cross-posted at that hero.